discovering my own personality...

You Are a Visionary Soul

You are a curious person, always in a state of awareness. Connected to all things spiritual, you are very connect to your soul. You are wise and bright: able to reason and be reasonable. Occasionally, you get quite depressed and have dark feelings. You have great vision and can be very insightful. In fact, you are often profound in a way that surprises yourself. Visionary souls like you can be the best type of friend. You are intuitive, understanding, sympathetic, and a good healer. Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

You Are the Individualist

4 You are sensitive and intuitive, with others and yourself. You are creative and dreamy... plus dramatic and unpredictable. You're emotionally honest, real, and easily hurt. Totally expressive, others always know exactly how you feel.

What number are you?

my results are out, n of course, they are terrible..physics and materials sci..two sucky subjects..have to retake nx sem le..i've tokked to alfred on phone for abt 2 hrs juz now before choir..coz i really sad.i really have difficulties coping with all the academics as well as other stuff lor.i'm super sick...mentally as well as physically...y i everytime hav to take an exam twice in order to do well huh??since sec sch,i've discovered this trend...chinese,hav to take twice...in JC..same,chinese,took twice to do well...and in uni??my English..nid to take twice to do well..y muz i do more work than others to achieve good results? is there something wrong wif me?aniway,i'm quite sick and tired of all these..but still can't give up..hav to continue wif my life still..anyway,no pt crying over spilt milk..can oni tell myself to:" smile xue ying, JIAYOU!!" poor alfred,hav to bear wif me..and he has tried his best to cheer me up..haha..can tell..lucky i still got him,if not,i really dunno if i can still survive..oso,i told my mum abt my results..she an1 wei4 wo3..but think she is quite disappointed oso.hai~..i've disappointed my parents again..wat shud i do?

i saw alfred's brother yesterday..finally...hmm..he is so different from alfred.perhaps is becuz he has been abroad for so long ba..but undeniably,he is really smart...haha..pei4 fu2,,but of course wun compare myself wif him lar..it is very demoralising to compare wif him anyway..coz his results are either high distinctions or distinctions..wat the...yar..shd ask him if i can hav some of his smart cells..haha..ok,tt's crap..yesterday is a very happy day,coz i really enjoy myself,or can i say i alwis enjoy myself when i am wif alfred..his parents are also very friendly..i sometimes feel so paiseh when they keep serving me..haha..

juz heard tt my ex-pe teacher, Mr John Lim, had passed away..i was so shocked..y??y god is so cruel..such a nice tcher,how can it lidat..it oso tells me that life is really full of unpredictabilities..wat can happen the next moment,no one will noe..hai~...very unfair..but think back,when will life be fair?if it is fair, then everyone will be indifferent...and life will be meaningless too..the oni person who can change our lives is ourselves..oni we can find the best for ourselves...at the same time, treasure wat you have around you.coz you wun noe if u hav the chance to do so again...yup =...(
hope he and his wife will lead a better life in their nx life...anyway,i'm not superstitious..but that is juz my belief..a belief that human beings do reincarnate after death...

ok,sad things aside...christmas is coming!!!how i wish that it can come really soon...i'm counting down everyday...hmm...hope this christmas is like last year's...equally enjoyable...alrite,i'm super tired le...nitez...

sleepy eyes...

last night slept rather late, oso dunno y...juz can't sleep..and this morning, due to human alarm, i woke up at 8am, as usual...now abit tired..*yawn*..

have been really busy these few days..both with choir practices and carollings.hmm...how i wish today is 24 Dec. at least, it tells me that Christmas is coming??oso, a one whole week of rest??haha..it will be more than happy men..of course, before reaching there, i have to have all these practices first..so must be patient..

me finally quiting my hall subcomm post..thou ppl may think that it is not worthwhile,but wat can i do..i have my Choir as my MAIN eca..yup..so watever the case,i have to put my post to an end in order to allow myself to gather enough time to juggle between ECAs and others (family and friends)..hope it is a wise choice...nvm..dun think so much le..since i've decided,den shud be persistent wif my thoughts..haha..

can't wait for carolling sessions to come..coz i think carollings will be more fun than having choir practices ba..haha..on the whole, Christmas songs are really much nicer than those choir songs..easier to learn ma..haha..oso, can see those audience standing in front of us, appreciating our music..hmm...how nice. though the first carolling we had at suntec is quite atrocious, due to the terrible acoustics of the place and oso the children show at the outside..can't even hear our own voices..but lucky, the next day's one at Plaza Singapura is much much better..haha..we did enjoy ourselves at that moment of singing..

i think i've decided to cut my hair after having it long for abt 4 mths plus..coz having long hair is quite troublesome..haha..as i had never had long hair before..yup..hmm..oso dunno wat style i wanna cut..wateva lar..juz pray hard that it wun turn out to be super ugly can le..anyway, c how lor..oso, i haven choose a date to go have my hair cut..alamak..like got so many things to do still..argghhh...*calming myself down*...

tomorrow morning can go home again..yeah..so happy men..but having a headache planning my timetable oso.Huiyi and Chuying are going to plan the timetable today..wondering what they will come up wif??of course, i have given them some suggestions lar..c how first lar..if can,den use..if not,i shall make some contributions too..heehee..hope they wun come after me..ok, have to end here le..coz i nid to go eat breakfast..haha

choir camp has finished...

my choir camp has finally ended yesterday..feeling relaxed now..for the past few days are really tiring,but at the same time,enjoyable...the games are quite fun..ahem..coz i'm one of the programmers ma..thou it is tedious to have 6hrs of pract each day except last day,and stuffing alto part into my brain,we do have our fun..haha..i made many new frenz too..erm,but i seldom tok to them oso..coz i dun like to mix around wif ntu choir ppl..oopz!! yar,but it is true..i can be very enthu at times,but juz dunno y i can't for choir..

and yesterday is the last day..my grp (house of NINO) won..yeah!!! and think we deserved it lar..coz we really have a very limited manpower..and we everything kao4 zi4 ji3...i do like my grp beta than i like the choir..haha..yesterday during grp performance,i'm really very stressed..coz i'm the oni alto in the performing grp..very scary..den those songs tt i've learnt before are soprano's part..so confusing...and of course, i screwed up in the last song..the " I saw mummy kissing Santa Claus"...i was overpowered by the rest..and i lost my tune...but, the rest of them are really good.. =)

wateva it is,it has ended...and practices resume on coming monday...and tomorrow i still have caroling at suntec..wondering how it will turn out....hmmmmm......

returning from a rather short break...

time past so fast,i wanna stay at hme more oso can't..really enjoy the past few days at hme..thou i fell sick again,but it is really happy moments..haha..if time can be rewind,it will be super nice men..we go shopping together,chit chatting,watch tv together...how nice..

choir camp is going to start tomorrow..super sianz...but no choice,i have to attend...suddenly a thot come to my mind..perhaps,if i stop staying in hostel,all these problems will not occur le..but,there is a dilemma lingering in my mind..if i gonna quit staying,i will have more time at home (yeah yeah), and have ppl to tok to..oso,i will have my holidays...haha..and no nid to spend time thinkin of my ECAs...yar rite....

but the problem is,i will have to spend more time travelling up and down..hmm...and wat if i have nite classes??how???yar,very troublesome..anyone can give me any suggestions??oso,i'll have to wake up early in the morn and travel all the way down (hmm..tt's not a problem,coz i'm ok wif waking up early)..ok,yar...so how?

oh,my cousin gave birth le..yesterday midnite.it is a she,haven see her yet,but heard from ma tt she is very pretty.ok lar,understandable,coz my cousin and her husband both v good lookin..wow,i'm going to become ah yi le..but,quite weird..i so young,den she address me till like so old..hmm..but betta den my youngest cousin who is oni 3yrs old..haha..looking forward to meet them during Christmas..yar..

den received an email from the mentors tt the mentees we taught have all passed their PSLE..hehe..our hardwork did count leh...ok,i gonna watch tv alone le..

wow..holiday is here...yanxin is also here in hostel to pei2 wo3

my youngest sister, yan xin, is here in my room to pei2 wo3 for this week..it is mother's suggestion..coz yan xin is quite bored at home and oso no one look after her...the suggestion is good. at first, yan xin is also quite happy,coz can come to a new environment...so excited about everything..

yan xin leaning against the cupboard while watching tv...

then, today, she starts to show a sian look le..she is v bored with everything here..understandable..coz no one tok to her when i went for choir practices..so,she will feel very bored..wat to do, i can't possibly clone another me rite..den the whole day,she is extremely sianz...oni can use comp and watch tv..if not, will be reading story book..wat should i do to make her feel beta??

worse still, choir usually starts from 7-10pm..den sometimes,if got meeting or wad,it will start earlier or end later...hai~..den when i reached my room, she is already going to sleep le..thank god that alfred will be here tomorrow..but wat time will he come and wat time will he leave,i not very sure..but hope he can keep my sis company..i juz wish to go home as soon as possible...think yan xin will feel the same too...

my sister and i rotting in the room, so try to entertain each other...haha

feelin so free...

13 November 2004

exams are finally over.i went back immediately after materials science paper..actually, not really immediately lar..i went out wif alfred to find my top,so tt can match wif the skirt tt i'll be wearing for the night..oh,btw...coz it is my cousin's wedding dinner...so we went jurong pt, as usual..we had fish and co. den we start to walk around to hunt for top...heehee...can't find..so we went bugis...den finally found one..yup..really take a long time to finally conclude wif a suitable top...so fickle-minded...but tt's me lar.den,nothing much about the dinner. after tt, our whole family decided to walk home from orchard..not far actually,especially wif so many ppl accompanying you..haha..den my sisters and i sang throughout the way hme. quite fun..

15 November 2004

i went out wif alfred again..we went to watch "The Shuttle"...quite scary..but that stupid alfred keep laughing..dunno laughing at me or the show..wateva, but it is quite irritating thou..haha..before tt, we were loitering around coz we hav lotsa time to spend before the movie..so as we walked around Tampines Mall, i tot i saw Abel...yes,Abel Ho..wif a gal beside him...think it is him ba..coz he keep staring at me like knowing who i am..hmm...but he had slimmed down quite alot..hahah...oops..den,nothing much abt tt day...

19 November 2004

me and alfred went Geylang East Library to find art pieces done by Leonardo da Vinci..coz i really into "The Da Vinci code" thingy...well,coz i'm not a Christian,so shall not make much comments abt the story..but it decodes wat Da Vinci had drawn..v interesting...haha..ok,back to the main point..i saw Ms Lim Ah Ber...yes...the Chinese teacher...haha..she still can remember me...dunno whether it is a good thing or bad..yar...the library trip was not a fruitful one,coz most of his books are borrowed...hmm...y huh?? nvm...den we went to eat dim sum...yup,the one i ate one yr ago wif someone else...ok, it is quite filling actually..and moneyworth...den we went to watch "The Incredibles" at jurong pt...it is a really funny show..thou abit long..but worth watching..ok,den something bad happened on tt day...shall not say it..but,i will not do tt again to alfred again...no matter wat...ok,not tt i dun wanna say,but coz it will take me hrs to explain the whole process..too lazy le..haha..

calling for..."Materials Science"

wow,finally reaching my last paper le..so happy..but i really scared abt my results..hai~..anyway,dun think too much le..

takin a rest after long hours of study..

today really v sian...dunno that actually it is a holiday..wat holiday,erm..i not very sure about that..but is super super sian..coz i still have to study for my last paper..
Materials Science...a subject with the most number of formulas to memorise..and the formulas are very confusing..hai~..but no matter wad,i've walked so far le..shd not stop..so muz continue..heehee...

now very hungry..haven eat lunch yet..thinking of our canteen food make me lose appetite le..so tt's y i drag till now still haven eat..hmm..but wat else i can eat?? have to walk v far to find food if i wan to...c if i got mood anot first lor...ok..muz go le..

break is over...continue with materials science...

my untidy desk during exam.. 

*sigh*...no more micro and macro...the worst subject is yet to come...

And wat we had today? econs!!! thought that i'll have nothing to write on the thick answer booklet,i was pretty surprised that i can manage to write something on it.people like Jiaquan think that i took econs before,but they juz can't get the actual fact into their mindset..hai~..anyway,who cares. And wat i'll be having on wed is physics..perhaps the next blog that i'll be posting will be full of moans and crys..etc..i dun understand how to study physics.though many will say, "remember the formulas and definitions".."understand the concept"..bla bla bla..but still,wat's the point? i've been doing this since secondary school,but wat i've got..is quite obvious in my results..the same formulas applied can result in different answers,or even got a big "X" in my script..wat's wrong?

no matter how tough the route is,we still have to walk through..and only to experience,we'll learn more,not juz academically,but maybe socially??

Alfred is really nice to me,especially now,when i'm having exams..he'll bring food for me,help me buy breakfasts when he books out,and leave small little encouraging notes either on my notice board or my calendar,call me on and off to check if i'm still able to cope wif studies...well,he is really very nice..juz so nice that i can't find a word to describe..eh,maybe it's oso due to my limited vocab ba..haha..how can i bear not to love him whole-heartedly?
"an end of a painful relationship is a start of a better one.." now i understand..so ppl,dun feel sad when any trouble is bothering you..as after you've pulled through this,it is another sunshine..juz remember: there is alwis a sun shines after rain..(eh, provided it is day time)..and the sunshine is always much brighter than before..(due to a contrast between rain(dark) and sun(bright))..

alright,i have to bathe now..later still hav to pia physics..yup..

bio warfare is over finally...haha..but results maybe scary.. =[

today's life science exam is really v crazy..how these prof expect us to remember all the small little details in the lecture notes??but i'm sure got such crazy ppl to go memorise every single thing..wateva..a 2 1/2h paper can finish within less than 1h..oh my god,can u believe it??still got time to go evaluate whether to stay till the whole exam is over or to leave at 10.30am..and after much evaluation,i decide to leave the exam hall..coz the time can be used for more meaningful stuff than sitting down there and stare at the questions tt i've got no idea wat the answer is..so let's pray hard ba...or shd i say,i shall pray hard ba..anyway,it's over and gone..if going to see the notes again,maybe will be nx semester le..meaning "da3 bao1"..*touchwood*..

now muz mug for my econs again..so sick,but better than life science lar..ok,shud be ok ba...dun think so much le...GET DOWN TO WWWWOOOORRRRKKKKK!!!!!! *sigh*

guess wad??today is my first paper....MaTHs...

i've not had enuf sleep since yesterday..dunno y can't sleep..sianz..den dis morning woke up at abt 6.10am to continue study my maths. however, when i stared at the paper juz now,i literally forgot almost all the formulas(except some easy ones)..think i'll have a high chance of retaking this module..anyway,it is rather predicted ba..i've not been performing well ever since i step into uni..especially for maths and physics..they are similar..but more indepth..and tt makes me feel inferior..so difficult..everytime do tutorials till i v pek chek..anyway,it's over..c the results den start moaning ba..
now feeling v tired...think is because this is exam period..many ppl start to become more hardworking..heehee..and tend to sleep at v late timing..hmm..so i believe tt many ppl are suffering from an illness during exams....that is exhaustion..wateva the case,finishing a paper is a symptom of an alleviating stress and fear..wow,exams can be that scary if you nv realise lor..well,i shall mug again...this time is physics...wait til i complete my exams le den i'll come back ba....

for those who read this blog, all the best for the rest of the exams....10 more days to go k...hang it there k...

i've tried my best le...everything else shall leave it till after exams..

wow..i've changed my image...eh,more towards blog's image lar..haha..anyway,this is oni a transition period.."improvement is still in progress"...but perhaps will last till end of the exams...and Gek Tiang..haha..u tag a msg huh....thanx alot...huiyi too...mugging is indeed a v tedious,irritating...wad else...oso v brain draining...anyway,tt's not the point...the point is, after exams can play,can slack..can do watever i want without restrictions..wwwooooooohhhhaaaaaaa.
oops!!!...*demure*..
anyway,i shall not be seeing alfred for two weeks le..tokkin about alfred,i today den realise that we got no common topic at all..wateva i say,he not interested..oni fu1 yan3...and wateva he says,i oso not interested..but will reply him...to start the ball rolling..yup..wat's wrong wif us?? in the past,we like got so many things to tok abt..but now??oso,shud we keep tokkin rubbish?or something constructive,like....wad huh?? to him,i can never find a rite topic to tok to him..dunno y..oso quite sian wif all these stuffs.anyway,shall concentrate on my study now..as for these,two weeks later den say ba..hahaha..
ok,carry on mugging now...*yawn* *yawn*....oops....

*sob sob*... =(

dunno what happened to me today..i'm v v depressed.actually is since yesterday already lidat..my comp dunno what went wrong again...hai~..i really v sian wif it le..also,exams are making me worse...now i'm sick,having a stupid sore throat and keep feeling like vomitting..really wanna cry..y i always so suay??
two weeks of exams may seem fast...but it is really v v long to me..tmr i going home.coz i really not feeling well..lucky got alfred there for me..if not,i really dunno how..is there such thing as pre-exam sickness??meaning depression???if have den i'm one of them ba...my brain dying..my health collapsing..my eyes closing...how sad.wat should i do wif my stupid comp?and wat shd i do wif the lacking in coping wif my exams??how??
who can help me??hai~....

arhhhhhh....exams coming real soon!!!

aiyo...my comp is super irritating..anyway,dunno y yesterday can't get into blogger..watever it is,yesterday went for my health check-up..everything is fine except i nid lotsa EXERCISES!!! and drink lotsa water lor..hai~~~never mind,i'll find ppl to go exercise with me..hahaha...
exams are really annoying!! they make me study SssoooooOOo hard,and restrict my movement..meaning can't go anywhere further than the campus itself..haiyo,v sian...den i study till so hard,if i still not doing well,i really will faint..hmm...maybe should plan of where to go before the results come out..wei4 yu3 chou2 mo2 ma...but pray hard tt i can do well or...if not how???
dear dear is coming later...i really nid him lor..so stressed up..really wanna kua3 le..at least if he is here,he can tell jokes and make me happy for that moment..eh,tt moment only...ok,should not waste much time le...get started ba...JIAYOU!!!

today is really v suay men....

today had my two idiotic tests (physics and materials)...hai~..think i fail again..really dunno y,my mind is blank.sianz...was actually quite sad,coz i studied till so hard and yet,i black out during the tests..tt's not all..i went to huiyi's room after the test..btw,we took some photos for me to put up on friendster...ok,back to the main pt.juz when we are about to leave for maths lecture,it rains...so heavy lor..den on my way out of hall 7,i slipped and fell...it's really painful men..and got a cut on my toe...den went for the lect wif my wet umbrella on my hand..i was actually holding it throughout the lecture..coz i forgot to bring a plastic bag to contain it..and oso,no plaster for my wounded toe...watever it is....
and the worst of all,i made alfred angry... =..( my mum wan me to stay overnite at hall coz it is raining heavily at my hse there..so i agreed..however,i forgot to tell alfred,who still thought tt i'll go home after everything is done..so he waited...and den when he ask if we can leave,i den told him tt i'm staying over...he was quite pissed off (easily shown on his face and his actions)..anyway,he juz walked out of the room...den i followed him...along the way, we nv tok..i was quite scared..but maybe i'm oso v tired,so i nv really care abt it..i scared tt i may say something wrong oso..but anyway,i apologised after tt..yup..we are quite ok le..i hope..dunno y,sometimes i juz think tt we hav many things dun see eye to eye..some things i find tt his approach is wat i really cannot take it..dunno y..but i dun dare to tell him oso.dun wanna hurt him,coz he is doing me a favour,can't be so bad rite? but i still love him no matter wad..i may be sianz wif our different perspectives,quite irritated wif him teasing me,super buay da han when he starts nagging...but above all these is LOVE!!! i love him so much...yup...no matter how suay i've been today,his forgiveness has healed all these problems...heehee...

hai...another round of tests are so near....

there is nothing special about today,yesterday or the day before...i've watched the korean scary movie...eh,dun really remember wat's the name...like ouija dunno wat lar..anyway,it is the first scary movie tt i managed to finish watching..haha..thou still got cover here and there abit,but it's a major improvement.. ;)
den today have to start studying for life sci on wed..haiyo..v sian leh..coz all the notes are full of things tt need lotsa analysis..yup..anyway,still have to study..so no pt complaining rite? oh,i've signed up for the NKF health screening thingy..nv try before...so sign up lor..anyway,shd at least have some knowledge of my own health ma..yup..
tmr v v slack, oni have to attend one lesson and tt is econs..haha..den hav more time study my life sci..hope really have time ba..anyway,i shall end here le..coz i need to pia my life sci..hmm...ok,Good Luck to MMMMEEEE!!!!!

it's a long and tedious day...

i'm almost late for today's lab early in the morn at ard 8.30am..coz i overslept till 8.10am den woke up..rush like mad lor,and nv eat breakfast...thank god tt carolyn gave me a can of milo and a snack bar..but still no time to eat...tokkin abt the labwork,it is really sickening..have to calculate so much..press the calculator till my hands numb...moreover,so long nv use calculator in such a fast speed le,tt's y my hands tend to go out of control..haha..
after practical,i went to CITS to find out wat's wrong with my comp..everything is ok until i started to serve the net..hai~~..den the person oso can't figure out y,so she trail and error abit..oni in a more pro manner ba..den there goes my lunch le...but while waiting for her to figure out wat's wrong,i eat my bar and drink my milo...hoping it can "tahan" till after lects...and finally she managed to fix my comp..hahaha...so so so happy..
den i tried to use wireless network in MLT...hmm...tt huiyi said she noe how to set up,so help me to set up the network..but she took abt one hr but still the same..den i decide to ask jia quan..haha...good move..he told me to find the NTUWL server or wat..den,somehow it works..yup..den half the lesson is wasted le..not oni tt,after i managed to get the connection up,the comp seems to refuse my username...so sick...den i spent another 30 minutes on tt..by the time i complete the setup and got into the lecture site...the lesson left abt 5 minutes...den tt's the end of the lesson...hai~~...wat the....
hmm...after tt i finally can have a proper meal le..thou not sure whether it is a breakfast,lunch or dinner tt is taken at abt 3.45pm...but,think i hav an enjoyable meal ba...hehehe...alfred will scold me again for not having proper meals..or skipping meals...hai~~~but tt's not what i purposely did one...

tada...i'm back finally..haha...;)

wow,after so long,anyone miss my blog??haha...phew..i finally finished installing all the necessary stuff for my laptop..so happy,can "touch" my comp again..
ok,i'm v v happy today..the four of us meet after so long..den that jiayu keep crapping,makin weird english pronunciation,and go crazy..haha..den tt liwen...hai~ as usual,oni become thinner..haha..yup,quite fun thou we oni hav a short meeting.
tests coming up nx week,so sian...got life science,materials sci and physics...wad the....all come at the same time,so irritating..den exams coming real soon oso..hai~..ok,enuf of complaining..i got nothing more to say le..end here...i love my dear dear..muz say,if not he'll complain..hahaha...oopz!!!

ALERT!!!!

my stupid laptop kena virus!!!...worst out of worse is,i reformatted my comp...and when i plugged in the stupid mouse,the comp juz shut dwn lidat..den it totally no response at all...hai~~ dunno how long it will take to finish repair..den nothing to entertain me at the present moment..and think i will have difficulty posting up blog for the time being..oso,thanx hui yi for lending her comp for me to post this blog up...hehe...ok,shall not ba4 zhan4 her comp for too long...end here...

p/s: dun miss my blogs while my comp is still under repair hor...hahaha...

hmm..quite meaningful,so i post...and i think it is very true too..

Life is the process of finding love; every person will need to find three people
in their life.
First person is you, Second person is the one you love most,
Third person is the one who love you most, and the fourth is the one you spend the rest of your life with.
In life, firstly you will meet with the one you love most, and learn how love
feels.
Because you know how love feels, so you can find the person who loves you most.
When you have experienced the feeling of loving others and being loved, you will
then know what it is you need most.
Then you will find the person who is most suitable for you, to be able to spend
the rest of your life with.
Sadly, in real life, these three people are usually not the same person.
The one you love most doesn't love you.
The one, who love you most, is never the one you love most.
And the one you spend your life with, is never the one you love most or the one
who love you most.
He is just the person who happens to be at the right place at the right time.
Which person are you in other people's life?
No person will purposely have a change of heart.
At the point in time when he loves you, he really loves you.
But when he doesn't love you anymore, he really doesn't love you anymore.
When he loves you, he can't pretend that he doesn't.
Same goes, when he loves you no more, there's no way he can pretend he loves
you.
When a person doesn't love you and wants to leave you.
You must ask yourself if you still love him,If you also don't love him anymore, do not keep him just to save your pride.If you still love him, you should wish him happiness, and hope that he will be with the one he loves most, not stop him from it. If you stop him from finding true happiness with the one he loves, it shows you
already don't love him,And if you don't love him, what rights do you have to blame him for a change of
heart?
Love is not possessive,
If you like the moon, you can't just take it down and put it in your basin,
But the moonlight still shines upon you.
In other words, when you love a person, you can use another method of possessing
the person.Let him become a permanent memory in you life.If you really love a person, you must love him for what he is.Love him for his good points, and the bad,You can't wish for him to become like what you like him to be just because you
love him.If he can't change to become what you like him to be, you don't love him
anymore. When you really love a person, you cannot find a reason why you love him,
You only know that no matter when and where, good mood or bad mood, you will
wish to have this person be with you.
Real love is when two people can go through the toughest problems without asking
for promises or listing criteria.In a relationship, you have to put in effort and give in at times, not always be on the receiving end.Being away from each other is a type of test,If the relationship isn't strong, then you can only admit defeat.
Real love will never become hate.
When two people are in love, They love to ask each other to swear, to make promises.
Why do they ask each other to swear and promise? Because they don't trust each other, they don't trust their lover. These swear and promises are useless; Till the sky falls, till the ocean dry, my love for you will never change!We all know that the sky will never fall; the ocean will never dry, Even if it does happen, are we still alive by then?
Be careful when making promises; don't make promises that you cannot keep.
Swear by things that can never happen, because it can never happen, so no harm
just saying it casually.
Remember? Swearing by things that can never happen are the most touching!!?
In a relationship, what you say is one thing, but what you do is another;
The one saying, doesn't believe; the one listening, also doesn't believe.
Which person have you found so far?
In the world so big, which person have you found?
And who has found you?

hai~...school starting real soon...

wah,this holiday is really fast...come fast,go oso fast..and i've wasted my precious holiday..i saw my schedule wrongly,thot that this wk got econs test,and waste alot of time studying econs,and nv do any homework..today den i noe tt it is nx wk..hai~..so blur of me...make me so pek chek..now muz "pia" tutorials le..sianz..

today went out wif alfred again..we go buy dinner and my breakfast for the days ahead..but most of the time,he is sleeping..so,we dun tok much..sometimes i'm thinkin..are we really compatible? coz we hav many different interests..and he alwiz agree wif wateva i say,and i think it is not good..but he is a really nice guy..so nice tt i dun wana hurt him..wan to protect him..is it really love?? i dunno...and wat shd i do...i dunno..and y this thot will come into my head on and off?? i oso dunno...but i really treasure him alot..tt's what i noe..anyway,wat i noe is he really loves me..much more than simon ba..anyway,why would i mention this guy?? haha..he is someone tt i dun wish to tok abt,dun wish to think abt,dun wish to see at all..not becoz we've broken up,but many things hidden...unrevealed..and nv reveal....wateva..but it's good to hav this experience..it makes me treasure alfred much more..thou i compare,but alfred is a much suitable guy..so ti3 tie1 alwiz..is tt y i love him??i dunno..but i will do anything for him..i will miss him when i din c him..i will treasure the time wif him..are these signs of love??

no matter wat,there is something tt stop me frm this tot...i can't figure out wat it is..anyone there to give advice???

ok,i promise alfred to slp early..dun wan him to worry...so i shall turn in now..

oleh....oleh oleh oleh....

feel so extremely happy!!one wk break is coming or shd i say has jus started..finally finish all my tests le..haha..but think i wun do v well ba.anyway,it's over le..now can song1 yi4 kou3 qi4 le..phew..oops,i juz accidentally killed a mosquito while scratching my hand..pai seh..
juz now during the last maths lect,i fell asleep again..hai~..but think i too tired le,fell asleep oso dunno.den my forehead became v red..haha..den i blur blur walk back to my hall after the lect..
oso,alfred is coming later to do puzzle wif me,and goin watch midnite movie..haha..feel so relax and happy..hope he can come real soon.but i still hav lap report to hand in..and muz really study during this recess..if not i think i'll suffer more for the rest of the semester ba..yup..muz not disappoint my parents again...
yesterday nite tok to Liwen after choir pract on phone..feeling so good..coz ever since i came into NTU,my senses are becomin numb..no feel for frenship..it's a real torture in here..in class,ppl nv really treat u as fren,but colleage...yup..and tt's v sad..tokkin to Liwen make me feel tt there is oso real frenz ard..we tok alot alot..hope to meet her soon..hehehe..who ask her to be equally impt as my dear alfred.so muz spread my luv equally ma..
ok,i now super tired,go for a nap first...*yawn*...

Very tired...

my brain is almost dead now...very tired...sorry alfred,i slpt late again.fri still got tests coming up.hai~..but even i v tired, i still wanna say...alfred, i miss u alot...dunno y, but my mind now is all on u. thanx4 writing on my friendster, i appreciated it v much..ok, i shall continue my blog on fri..good night!!!

tEacHerS' dAy!!!

today is teachers' day for my info..i realised it not long ago oni..hai~..y NTU got no teachers' day??den at least i can have 2days' break..haha.but anyway,today i oni got morning lesson.den after tt i waited in my pathetic room for hours for alfred to come...he told me 3pm,but he came at 5.30pm,i think..abit angry,but hav to understand tt he booked out late,and hav to go beach road to buy army stuff..yup..
anyway,even thou we oni meet for a few hrs and i did not really accompanying him,i had a great dinner wif him,n shoppin for groceries...haha.the feeling is good..at least we can spend some quality time together..
quite happy tt i got into welfare sub-comm..hehe..at least can get some pts frm there..if not i think i die le.but,bad news is i never qualify for the vocal trainer thingy...anyway,it's good..dun nid to put me into a dilemma.i can an1 xin1 de go for choir pract le..hehe..
now watching show..good entertainment.if not i'll totally sianz diao..ok lar..i will miss my show if i continue writing...it's such a wonderful day today!!!

i'm hungry...

today i skipped the earliest lecture-physics..coz last nite i slept v late..at abt 3am,den can't make it for today's lecture..but i promised alfred tt i will not turn in so late and no skipping lectures again..(",)..
tmr got tutorials again,hope i can finish all my hmework,so tt i can have more time to pei alfred on wed..i'll try my best..oh,today is another choir pract..the song we learning now,elijah rock,is v interesting..hope it turns out to be real nice..hehe..
now supper hungry,coz i nv eat much during dinner as i not hungry...lucky Keith go cook for us now...he is not tt bad as anybody thinks he is,perhaps it will be beta if he tok lesser..hehe...oops..ok,tt's all for today...

(",)

Wow,today is a v happy day,coz i finally can go out wif alfred le..haha..we went to watch 13 going on 30..(",)..it's a v touching show,i first time cried so much during a show..make alfred so worried,tot what happened to me..sorry dear...i'm juz too emotional..den he bought beard papa for my breakfast tmr..how thotful he is,always think of me before himself..actually v tired le,coz fri nite do puzzle til 2am,den yesterday nite watch tv till dunno wat time..but,i still hav lotsa hmework to do..hai~..ok,think i'll hav a short blog tonite,coz i haven bathe yet..and is stinkin..hahaha..anyway,i hav left a good memory for today...hehehe...thanx so much,dear dear...

yeah!!!

finally weekend is here..today is the same as any other fri,but dunno why so happy.perhaps is bcoz resting days are coming ba..nothing much happen during the tutorials and lectures...the same old talks and people...
den,whole day play yahoo games til nite.nv really eat dinner (got reprimanded by alfred for not eating)...oni hav chinese tea (again) and an apple (again)...den come to the havoc interview at 8.30pm for publicity post..the interview is v qing1 song1...not like the previous one tt is so still...den i hav to draw something to represent havoc...drew an eagle...dunno y..but tt's the immediate instinct..so follow the feel lor..thou dun really look like one..er..hahaha.den still take pic,oso dunno for wat.
den too late le,so stayed in hall til tmr morning den go hme lor..lidat,alfred will feel more fang xin oso..ppl will get sick and tired of me ba..coz i here alfred,there oso alfred..haha..but bo bian,who ask me to luv him so deeply..(",)...not oni he dotes on me lor..i oso dotes on him,and care for him alot alot..hehe..yeah,sunday can c him le...so happy!!feel so xing4 fu2...ok,i shall go daydreaming now..eh,i mean nitedreaming..haha..*yawn*...

an "interesting" day...

early in the mornin got lab work..tot tt i will sian again,but there is this "interesting" professor tt speak so interestingly wif all his hong kong accent..and keep saying the word "interesting" when we dun even find the topic he said interesting..but he did entertained us for the morning..at least i'm awake early in the morn for the first time..haha..

den is a whole series of boring lectures again...esp life science,the lecturer lik rushing thru,n his notes v the microscopically small lor..den think he nids to go take up courses on how to make slides...he can giv first slide empty,den the rest words so small,lik i got eagle's eyes.oso,got pictures tt overlap..how to c?...hai~...den me and chu ying down there disturbing each other,mk me can't concentrate.

after tt is my choir pract..abit off performance today..nv really get everyone's attention,n nv teach well oso...dunno wat happen to me..hai~..anyway,it's over!!oh,but the combine is quite fun.Ms Lim is v interesting too...btw,before the choir ends,the com members lik ask some ppl to go to the front,include me..den they lite up candles on all the small cakes,and start singing birthday song in 4 different languages..abit weird,coz my bdae lik past long time ago le..but it's sort of fun..mk me feel a sense of presence there..haha..i shall hav the cake for tmr's breakfast..hmm...

alfred called me juz now to pei wo tok tok when i on my way hme,so swt of him.but think quite late le,den i can't really tok much to him,feelin abit wasted..but,nvm,at least we hav a short chat..(",)..aiyo,now super hungry le lor.den tt carolyn eating tuna bread in the room.smell so nice,mk me even more hungry...hmm...i go find something to eat le...hehehe...

...(-_-)....

wat the hell...i have to re-type everything again...sianz....wat did i say juz now?..oh,i went out wif chu ying to buy cup noodles in the afternoon...we actually walk not v far..but we like perspiring lik mad..think is due to the humid weather tt make me us so buay da han.den the whole day stayed in my room mugging...so boring..but bo bian,have to do the routine work..den actually i wanted to hav cup rice(not cup noodles) for my dinner,coz lazy to go out. but after one spoon of taste,i feel like puking le..it tastes terrible lor..dun buy tt..den ended up eating canteen 5 food again...think can get an award call "the loyalty customer of canteen 5"...literally eating canteen 5 food for days...and the chicken chop in canteen 3 for lunch..oh my god....den at nite got the interview for QT(oops,is QP..wat's wrong wif me,keep saying wrongly) vocal trainer post...but i lik give lotsa negative remarks...think they oso sian le..hai~..wat can i do...here got QP and there got choir...both i like...but can't possibly take both,coz it will really kill me.dunno lar...c how lor..till now still fan2 over this..tt's me..
alfred ah alfred...he got duty today again...can't call me..dunno y i always miss him badly when he hav duty(oni on duty)..but i'm used to it le..haha..anyway,i hope dis sunday can come faster...coz can c him after a long week..ok hav to go back to do my tutorials le...

hmmm....bored...

haha...finally got my own website, all thanx to hui yi.juz ended my choir practice today, feeling so lethargic after a long day since 8.30am physics lect..thou i slept thru 3 lectures out of the 4...not bad,at least i still manage to listen to one..actually,not really listening lor...coz i busy replying someone's letter...haha...oops, tt's bad attitude...dun learn!! it has become more and more busy as days passes, almost dying..think i really hav to hav a good rest over the week end, so tt can do some recharging...the life in here is not tt bad, but really nids lotsa time management..if not will hav to burn midnite oil lor...btw, there is no such thing as slp in hostel...ppl lik no nid to slp, and still can stay so energetic everyday...powerful sia...think i hav to go finish my econs tutorial le...tmr still have to attend lects and tutorials...hai~~....life is so boring...zhen1 shi4 liao3 wu2 sheng1 qu4....